An Open Letter To Rosie O’Donnell’s Feet
by Amy Lindorff
Dear Rosie’s Feet,
Why do we have to see so much of you?
I’m not necessarily against seeing people’s feet, and the only two pairs of shoes I really wear are open toe (and the only pair of shoes I really want have a little peep toe! SERIOUSLY I AM OBSESSED WITH THESE SHOES.), but please go away. You are on the billboards and you are here in this photo and I just can’t take it anymore. There is no reason that we need to see so much of you, and really I would think it would be possible (and not too much to ask) if all talk show hosts everywhere just kept their feet to themselves.
P.S. I do have to admit that you aren’t the worst feet I’ve seen. Those belong to a certain guy I came to know very well over the last year. Two words: Elf. Toes.